Brikar

"Transformers"
Starring: Shia LaBeauf, Megan Fox, Jon Voight, Josh Duhamel
Written by: Alex Kurtzman and Robert Orci
Produced by: Steven Spielberg
Directed by: Michael Bay

MOVIE
There's not much to say about "Transformers," really. It's two and a half hours of ridiculousness and mayhem starring a fine, energetic cast and a bunch of GIANT FUCKIN' ROBOTS FROM OUTER SPACE. Michael Bay finally manages to make a movie that's balls-to-the-wall action that's not utterly retarded ("Armageddon") or falls apart half way through ("The Island") with the help of writers Alex Kurtzman and Robert Orci ("Alias", "Mission: Impossible III" and "Star Trek") and the legendary Steven Spielberg (c'mon... I don't really need to list his credits, do I?)

The cast does pretty well with the roles they've got - the kids are charismatic and funny, Voight lends a more distinguished sense to the film but still seems to be having a lot of fun, and John Turturro is just plain hilarious. Tyrese Gibson and Josh Duhamel are suitable 'hottie soldier' characters who get to fire a lot of guns and act generally badass throughout.

The digital effects from Industrial Light and Magic ("Star Wars", "Star Trek: TMP") as well as Digital Domain ("Star Trek: Nemesis") are really friggin' awesome. The transformations of the robots are a pure joy to behold, and the "Bayhem" is a geek's wet-dream as the Autobots and Decepticons tear apart various urban landscapes. The sheer amount of carnage achieved in this movie for a full $100 million less than the utterly dull "Spider-Man 3" is astonishing.

All in all, "Transformers" has hardly any depth to it at all. The most complicated parts of this movie are the action sequences, which are frenetic and lengthy and exceptionally well-done. There's just enough plot to make the action fit together nicely without being stupid, and many of the comic bits are well-written and performed by a cast that looks and feels like it's having a blast, which always translates well to the audience. So "Transformers" ends up being the kind of mindless that's actually ridiculously fun instead of insulting. Bravo.

VIDEO
Sharp and colorful, the video transfer on the DVD just pops out of the screen. Being a Michael Bay movie, there's plenty of funky lens flares and lighting effects (Bay even describes himself in the special features as a lighting junkie) that translate extremely well to the small screen. Black levels in the nighttime scenes are great, and contrast is good in daytime sequences.

AUDIO
Damn. Just... damn. Crank this one up to 11, because "Transformers" fuckin' rocks. Room-shaking bass coupled with excellent rear-channel activity make this one of the most active, kickass surround tracks I've listened to in a while.

FEATURES
The special features disc is separated into three main segments: "Our World", "Their War" and "More Than Meets The Eye". "Our World" and "Their War" are the bulk of the features, comprised of a number of featurettes that can be selected individually or you can hit "play all". A mixture of interviews and behind-the-scenes footage, there's roughly 2 hours here that gives you a fantastic glimpse into the making of "Transformers", starting with Michael Bay's initial reluctance to making the movie on through the design and animation of the film's robot stars. There's plenty of talk about justification for character designs, a few deleted scenes, talk about problems with the script, even acknowledgment that Michael Bay can be a total dick on set. There's also a bit of talk about Bay listening to the concerns of the internet fandom (and Shia belittling them) and the death threats Bay received over the designs of the characters.

One of the things that stands out is that Shia LeBeauf (however the hell you spell it) actually seems very much like his character - he's very charming and very funny. An on-location bit about "man-piss on my piss" is a riot, and we even get footage of a near disaster on his very first day on set that would have knocked him out of the film entirely.

There's a ton of before and after looks at visual effects, a great deal of time spent with the United States military and the unprecedented amount of access granted to the "Transformers" crew. All in all, extremely well done and entertaining documentaries, to boot.

"More Than Meets the Eye" contains another featurette which probably should have been contained in one of the other sections. It details the process of creating the Scorponok attack sequence from storyboards up to final effects. Next is a series of concept artwork set to the film's score. After that are three of the film's movie trailers.

Each section and the main screen also contain easter eggs. One is a cheesy, 80's style commercial for a Transformer toy with Michael Bay's head, another is Michael Bay's cameo from the movie (which he cut, despite how expensive it was to shoot) and another is a lame bit involving the All-Spark tearing off a woman's dress when Sam drops it on the street during the film's climax.

SCORE
MOVIE: A-
A/V: A+
FEATURES: A
OVERALL: A

__________________
"A million monkeys typing until the end of time will produce the complete works of William Shakespeare. Ten thousand monkeys typing for ten thousand years will write a Hemingway. Ten monkeys typing over Columbus Day weekend will give you a Dan Brown."

http://olympusmans.blogspot.com
http://benforrealz.blogspot.com

Bean

Wow.. all "A". I'm thinking you liked it.

You're right though. Transformers was basically a mindless action flick, which is exactly what I was afraid it would turn out to be. Fortunatley, that's exactly WHY it worked out so well.

__________________
"I haven't faced death. I've cheated death. I've tricked my way out of death and patted myself on the back for my ingenuity. I know nothing."

--James T. Kirk

Brikar

Totally. It could easily have been that kind of mindless action flick that just plain sucks - like many of Bay's earlier movies, like "Bad Boys 2". But instead it has this incredible sense of fun to it that works out really well despite the 2.5 hour runtime.

I should also note that the first disc contains the teaser trailer for the movie (which is also on disc 2; who knows why it's repeated) and a short music video kind of thing called "Rise of the Autobots" and the trailer for next summer's "Iron Man" movie, which looks like it'll be lots of fun, too.

__________________
"A million monkeys typing until the end of time will produce the complete works of William Shakespeare. Ten thousand monkeys typing for ten thousand years will write a Hemingway. Ten monkeys typing over Columbus Day weekend will give you a Dan Brown."

http://olympusmans.blogspot.com
http://benforrealz.blogspot.com

Bean

I'm really looking forward to Iron Man.

I'm a little worried about the sequel to Transformers that we're now certain to get. I'm thinking that this one was a fluke for Bay, and we're not gonna see it again.

__________________
"I haven't faced death. I've cheated death. I've tricked my way out of death and patted myself on the back for my ingenuity. I know nothing."

--James T. Kirk

Brikar

Me too; but there's nothing we can do about it. Hopefully with everyone else back on board, including Spielberg, they can hit it again. Watching the special features, it's clear that the movie was put together mostly by Transformers fans - Bay is pretty much the only one who said he wasn't into the concept and even told Steven Spielberg he wasn't interested in making that movie... until he met with Hasbro and saw the potential of it.

__________________
"A million monkeys typing until the end of time will produce the complete works of William Shakespeare. Ten thousand monkeys typing for ten thousand years will write a Hemingway. Ten monkeys typing over Columbus Day weekend will give you a Dan Brown."

http://olympusmans.blogspot.com
http://benforrealz.blogspot.com

Bean

By potential I'm sure he meant potential profits....

__________________
"I haven't faced death. I've cheated death. I've tricked my way out of death and patted myself on the back for my ingenuity. I know nothing."

--James T. Kirk

Brikar

I dunno... I think Bay is a director much more concerned with visual style and impact over cohesive story and character. And giant fuckin robots from outer space kicking the shit out of each other really is right up his alley in that regard.

But yeah, potential profits must have appealed to him quite a bit as well, since he waived his director's fee in favor of a percentage. Ballsy.

__________________
"A million monkeys typing until the end of time will produce the complete works of William Shakespeare. Ten thousand monkeys typing for ten thousand years will write a Hemingway. Ten monkeys typing over Columbus Day weekend will give you a Dan Brown."

http://olympusmans.blogspot.com
http://benforrealz.blogspot.com

Bean

Well anything with Spielberg attached to it is a pretty sure bet as far as profits goes, but yeah, I'm sure the robot angle helped.

__________________
"I haven't faced death. I've cheated death. I've tricked my way out of death and patted myself on the back for my ingenuity. I know nothing."

--James T. Kirk